Hawaiian Life Lessons: Returning Home to Kauaʻi

Recently, I returned to my birth island of Kauaʻi to celebrate my birthday on my birthday. What made the trip even more meaningful was that I was there on a Monday, the same day of the week I was born.

I was born on Kauaʻi and spent my childhood there. We first lived on the sugar plantation town of Kaumakani and later moved to Kalaheo. Although I have lived on the mainland for many years, Kauaʻi remains deeply infused within me at a core level. It has always carried me through life.

Being born and raised there was a beautiful, magical, and spiritual existence. It was a childhood filled with nature, aromas, community, and simplicity. Looking back, I realize many of the values that guide my life today were planted on that island.

The Fragrance of Home

One of the first things I noticed when stepping off the plane was the warm air and gentle trade winds. Instantly, memories came flooding back.

The trade winds carry the aromas of the plants, flowers, ocean, and earth. It creates an immediate sense of calm and belonging. An instant feeling of, “Ahh, I’m home.”

The aromas of plumeria waft through the air. The scent is impossible to fully describe. It is soft, floral, comforting, and deeply woven into the experience of the islands.

Perhaps this is why scent has played such an important role throughout my life.

For over twenty years, I have been an aromatherapist and have used essential oils daily for wellness, self-care, and cosmetic formulation. Looking back, I wonder if my lifelong connection to fragrances began simply by growing up surrounded by some of the most beautiful natural aromas in the world.

After returning home to California, I found myself missing those scents of plumeria and pikake so much that I created products with pikake (jasmine sambac) essential oil and Hawaiian sandalwood (ʻIliahi) essential oil. I learned more about Hawaiian sandalwood and its history. Once over harvested, it is now being cultivated with a greater focus on sustainability. I purchased Hawaiian sandalwood from Miracle Botanicals and the aroma is absolutely divine. I made Pikake & ʻIliahi Lotion, Pikake & ʻIliahi Body Oil, and a Pikake & ʻIliahi Body Wash while listening to the music of Hawaiian singers Anuhea, Paula Fuga, Keali’i Reichel, and IZ. I still cannot get enough of these aromas.

Pikake & ʻIliahi Softening Body Oil  

I love this body oil. It was so simple to make, and it feels beautiful on the skin. Safflower oil has a naturally lighter, drier feel, so it absorbs beautifully into the skin without leaving a greasy finish. It is especially lovely applied right after a shower, while the skin is still slightly damp, helping to seal in moisture and leave the skin feeling soft, smooth, and nourished.

Safflower oil is also wonderfully soothing, making this body oil feel simple, pure, and comforting on the skin. The essential oils are a special treat, precious and expensive, but truly worth it when you want to indulge in something beautiful. Since only a small amount is used, they will last for quite a while, making each bottle feel even more luxurious.

Ingredients

8 ounces / 240 ml safflower oil (read about the skin benefits of safflower oil)
4 drops vitamin E oil
4 drops jasmine sambac essential oil*
4 drops Hawaiian sandalwood essential oil

Instructions

1. Add the safflower oil and vitamin E oil to a clean bottle with a pump lid.
2. Drop the essential oils directly into the bottle. (Note: Adjust the blend to your scent preference. For more jasmine aroma, reduce the sandalwood to 2 drops, smell the mixture, and then add more drops until you reach the scent you like.)
3. Gently swirl the bottle to begin blending the oils.
4. Place the cap or pump lid securely on the bottle.
5. Roll the bottle gently between your hands for 30–60 seconds to mix the essential oils evenly throughout the body oil.
6. Let the body oil sit for a few minutes, then it is ready to use.

*Comparing Jasmine sambac essential oil vs Jasmine grandiflorum essential oil

Jasmine sambac is sweeter, richer, and more sensual, with a creamy floral scent that can smell slightly fruity, tea-like, and exotic. It is the jasmine often associated with pikake, giving a lush, romantic, tropical floral note.

Jasmine grandiflorum is more classic, soft, elegant, and refined, with a lighter floral aroma that feels fresh, delicate, and slightly green. In blends, jasmine sambac feels more intense and intoxicating, while jasmine grandiflorum feels more graceful, airy, and traditional.

Returning to My Childhood Home

One of the meaningful parts of my trip was visiting our family home in Kalaheo.

Our home sat beside a forest filled with wandering green vines, tropical plants, flowers, and trees. As children, this was our playground. We explored nature daily, climbing, wandering, and discovering the beauty that surrounded us.

Kalaheo is near Mt. Waiʻaleʻale, one of the wettest places on Earth, and the landscape reflects that abundance. Everything is lush, vibrant, and intensely green.

Standing there again brought back memories I hadn’t felt in years.

I remembered the soothing sound of rain falling on our tin roof. Even today, it remains one of the most comforting sounds I know. Perhaps that is why I still find rain so calming.

Life felt wonderfully simple then.

We wore muʻumuʻus, walked barefoot, and spent our days outside. We visited neighbors without stress or rushing. There was no pressure to constantly be productive. We simply lived.

Looking back, I realize what a gift that was.

Growing Up Among Many Cultures

One of the greatest gifts of growing up in Hawaiʻi was being surrounded by people from many different cultures.

Our neighbors were Hawaiian, Chinese, Portuguese, Japanese, and Filipino. I was welcomed into their homes, experienced their traditions, celebrated alongside their families, and enjoyed their food.

Those experiences shaped how I see the world. They taught me to appreciate people from all backgrounds and cultures.

In many ways, those early experiences created a lifelong respect for diversity and community.

The influence remains with me today. I still eat rice almost every day because it was such a staple growing up among our neighbors.

One of my fondest memories is of our Hawaiian neighbor, he made Niʻihau shell necklaces on the island of Niʻihau. I am fortunate to have my mother’s beautiful 68-year-old Niʻihau necklace that he lovingly created and gifted to her. It is a treasured piece of family history and a connection to Hawaiʻi that I deeply cherish.

The Beauty of the Land (Āina)

Kauaʻi remains one of the most breathtaking places I have ever known.

The island is still filled with lush green vines, grasses, tropical plants, hibiscus, plumeria trees, and countless species of flowers and foliage.

As a child, fruits such as lilikoi, papaya, guava, and the small sweet apple bananas were simply a normal part of life. Looking back, I realize how special that was.

At the Kauaʻi Museum, I learned more about Hawaiian medicinal plants and was inspired by the work being done to preserve traditional Hawaiian agriculture.

I discovered the herbs from the beautiful Polipoli Farm and the incredible efforts they are making to nurture the land while growing canoe plants and Hawaiian herbs. Their commitment to sustainability and stewardship deeply resonated with me.

I now drink their teas daily and absolutely love them. Their dried apple bananas are also a favorite.

Supporting small Hawaiian businesses that care for the land feels like an extension of caring for Hawaiʻi itself. I also purchased earrings featuring pikake and plumeria (melia) flowers from the Hawaiian business Leighton Lam Designs to carry a small reminder of the islands with me every day.

The Healing Power of Nature

One of my favorite things to do on Kauaʻi is simply sit and observe.

Watching the ocean waves roll in and out.

Walking barefoot along the shoreline while the water gently washes over my feet.

Looking out across the endless shades of blue that seem impossible to describe.

Seeing sea turtles emerge from the water.

Watching dolphins leap and play.

Then sitting quietly as the sun begins to set and the sky transforms into shades of blue, pink, purple, orange, and gold.

These moments remind me how fortunate I am to be alive.

Whenever I experience beauty like this, I consciously imprint it into my memory so I can return to it later. During difficult days, stressful moments, or uncertain times, I bring those images back to mind and remember that I live in an incredibly beautiful world.

Nature has become one of my greatest teachers.

Lessons From the Sea Turtles

Several evenings, I sat quietly at a distance and watched large sea turtles slowly come ashore to rest for the night.

There was something profoundly moving about their presence.

These ancient creatures have lived in Hawaiian waters for generations beyond comprehension. Watching them, I felt as though they carried a wisdom that modern life often forgets.

Their lesson was simple:

Life is not an emergency.

There is no reason to rush everywhere.

The slower path is often the better path.

You will get there.

Just breathe.

Go with the flow of life.

Lessons From the Dolphins

On my birthday, I was fortunate enough to see dolphins swimming joyfully through the ocean.

Their lesson was entirely different.

Have fun.

Play more.

Lighten up.

There is so much joy available if we allow ourselves to experience it.

I cannot control the world, but I can control how I respond to it. I can choose gratitude. I can choose joy. I can choose to appreciate this incredible life.

The dolphins reminded me to do exactly that.

Understanding Aloha

For my birthday, my sister gave me the book Island Wisdom by Kainoa Daines and Annie Daly.

As I read through its pages, I felt it beautifully captured the essence of Hawaiʻi and the spirit of aloha.

Many people think aloha is simply a greeting.

It is much more than that.

Aloha is a way of being.

It is showing up as the best version of yourself with every person you encounter.

It is treating others with love, kindness, respect, and compassion.

It is offering your full presence.

It is truly seeing people and recognizing that we are all reflections of one another.

It is helping those who need support.

It is being kind to yourself.

It is trusting your intuition, listening deeply, and acting on your naʻau, your gut, your inner knowing and wisdom.

Aloha also means respecting the land, Āina.

It means understanding that these islands are not simply destinations to consume, but sacred places that deserve care, stewardship, and protection.

My Hawaiian Life Lessons

As I reflected on my trip home, these lessons became clear:

Live Aloha

Wherever you are. Smile more. Be kind. Offer your presence fully to others.

Slow Down

Take time to smell and see the flowers. Be grateful for your life and the people you love.

Protect the Earth

Every person, plant, animal, waterway, mountain, and ecosystem has immense value. We are caretakers, not owners.

Nurture Yourself Naturally

Care for your body with nourishing foods, natural ingredients, botanical skin and hair products, and products inspired by nature.

Trust That Everything Will Be Okay

When life feels overwhelming, pause.

Look at a flower.

Smell its fragrance.

Massage a fragrant botanical oil onto your skin.

Take a deep breath.

Nature has a remarkable way of reminding us that everything will be okay.

A Prayer for the Future of Hawaiʻi

It still brings tears to my eyes when I think about Kauaʻi.

The beauty of the land.

The fragrance carried by the trade winds.

The generosity of the people.

The feeling of belonging.

When I left the island, I found myself carrying a deep hope for its future.

I hope the local people who call Hawaiʻi home continue to have opportunities for land ownership and stewardship.

I hope sustainable agriculture and conservation efforts continue to grow.

I hope future generations can enjoy the same forests, beaches, mountains, and ocean that shaped my childhood.

I hope the beaches remain accessible to everyone, as they are meant to be.

Most of all, I hope these islands continue to be treated with the respect they deserve.

Kauaʻi is one of the most majestic, healing places I have ever known.

It is not simply where I was born.

It is part of who I am.

And I will always carry its lessons, its scents, its beauty, and its aloha with me.

Aloha.
🌺 Joan

Aloha kekahi i kekahi ♥️ Love one another

Hope isn’t blind optimism – it arises in the face of uncertainty. 
– Barack Obama